The beginning

I remember sitting in the neurologists office where I had been explaining the symptoms I had been experiencing the 3 months prior to my first GP appointment about this issue, then getting the reply “so Mr Brown this tingling you’re getting in the right side of your face that comes and goes and the right side of your upper lip is totally numb is a mystery to me” , this wasn’t the reply I was expecting nor wanted as to get to this stage took me 2 GP appointments and a month wait for this appointment and left me in a bit of uncertainly which left me thinking oh well I’ll just get on with it then as this can’t be anything serious as he didn’t seemed that concerned with it nor did he prescribe me anything for it. Over the following months the tingling and numbness started to subside and instances started to decrease but on the reverse the numbness transferred to my arms and the tingling into my hands and fingers, I didn’t go back to my GP as I thought they would just think I’m a hypochondriac making things up and wasting their time so I left it. The numbness in my arms did disappear after a few months but the tingling in my hands stayed, and if anything increased, other aspects also came into play, fatigue, walking into door frames and balance became an issue together with a sudden change in my mental health which contributed to a relationship breakdown, sleeping and anxiety, so I thought enough was enough and went and saw my GP (yet again), after explaining everything to her she came to the decision that all this was due to stress and anxiety and prescribed me some antidepressants, when I questioned her over the tingling in the fingers she said that could possibly carpal tunnel syndrome which she booked me in an appointment to get this tested at the local hospital.
I thought to myself after this visit this was closure and I knew what it was and what I had to do but this wasn’t the case, things escalated rapidly with my relationship, work and my anxiety to the point of breaking point, work put me through CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) which did help massively but I think it was just to help me through this situation as my head was gone, the stress and anxiety did fully take over in my daily routines, the anxiety was weird I went from an outgoing jack the lad to a bit of a recluse, I remember one situation where one of my very good mates from work was having a leaving party and I just literally couldn’t get out of the door, I kept looking at the clock thinking I need to leave by this time to get to there by this time, well this went on for so long I got to the stage where I was going to be late and ended up phoning him and explained I was unable to come which he fully understood and was really good about it, it was a bizarre situation though I must have been sitting on my sofa looking at the door for hours with my bag packed, hotel room booked but I just couldn’t do it. I missed my carpel tunnel appointment because at the time tingling fingers was the last of my worries as my relationship ended very badly and the house got put on the market and I ended up in my parents spare room doing my job from their kitchen table until a week before Christmas where I moved into my dream house, had a nice Christmas with the family and little girl then started the new year on a high, such a high even where I had taken on even more engineers in my team and I won manager of the month for January & February and ordered my new BMW, life was on the up, no looking back at this point I had turned everything around and becoming myself again, well it was the looking that started to become an issue, my sight in my left eye was becoming noticeably not so good and was even struggling to watch the TV, I had just put this down to an eye infection due to my bathroom being fitted and a lot of wood being cut and dust in the air so got on with it until the day I was out with my little girl and her friend at a play centre and I noticed it was getting worse hour by hour, it did actually get to the stage when I shut my right eye I couldn’t actually see anything, I rang the non-emergency hotline and explained the situation which they replied we’ll book you in to see the emergency doctor at the hospital right away which I agreed and headed straight up there. On arrival I saw the doctor who couldn’t explain what had happened and just gave me his “off the cuff” diagnosis that it may be a blood clot which certainly didn’t help me as all he had done was shine a torch in my eyes and asked if I smoked which by my reaction he wanted to get a second opinion, as the same as I wanted, luckily the emergency ophthalmologist was still on site and agreed to see me, he inspected my eyes then again with some drops added then concluded he couldn’t see anything wrong with them, I thought to myself here we go again, he told me to come back in a few days to the eye clinic who would carry on this investigation.
I attended the eye clinic a few days later and after about 30 minutes of the eye consultant looking at my eyes through different machines she also concluded she couldn’t see anything wrong with them either but to attend a field vision test the next day, I left the hospital with my dad saying I can’t see out of my left eye but I’ve had 2 top eye doctors telling me its fine, my first instant was am I going to lose it again but to finish these tests off to see if we can get to the root cause. The next day I went for the field vision tests and went in to see the consultant for the results hoping for an answer, her first answer in fact was “this doesn’t make sense” which I immediately replied “I agree”, she said what she saw in her tests doesn’t match what the field vision test has shown up, a couple of nurses came in to help but all looked confused in what they saw, I went yet again behind her eye test equipment for another look which I think even more confused her, I asked what was going on and why all the confusion and non-explanation of my situation, she said “ everything I have seen in your eye is absolutely perfect front and back but your field eye test shows you have no vision from your pupil” and she showed me the results from the field test which had a big black circle over a target “and I can’t explain this”, after sitting in the waiting room for some time I got called back in with the doctor saying she couldn’t explain this situation and nor could her supervisor so they have agreed to send me for a head and eye MRI to see if that would shed some light on the situation, which it did and my first appointment after the MRI was with the neurologist consultant and 4 eye clinic appointments, 3 neurologist appointments, 2 MRI scans, Moorfields hospital in London appointment and a lumber puncture here I am.

#msfightback

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